Almost Thirty

Came across this blog today and cried over how beautiful it is to have somewhere I wrote for so many years. I'm turning thirty on Monday and wanted to give myself the challenge of coming back on here to write and remember. Today I read over a blog post I wrote in 2015, 10 years ago where I talked about how impactful meeting Shay felt and how it felt like he was going to change my life forever. Ten years later and we're married and have a life together. That feels absurd and insane and beautiful. I also come here often to think about Sparcky and remember him. Losing him is something that I mourn every day. I cried today to think that I'm beginning my first new decade without him in my life. It's funny how when you're young the idea of getting past twenty-five seems absurd. Turning thirty feels like my life is only just starting and I can't believe there's so much of it still to live. I never imagined living a life without him or without my family or with Shay or anything at all. I think it could be good to write here and remember this new time. Just a check in for now, but I'll be back.